Quotes of the Year: Part 4

Part 4 of some things that I found amusing this year


Jay: I’d love to be on the dole in this weather.

Lezzer:  I’ve got a letter to go for one of those over 40s health checks.
Jay:  Are you going for a genital test?

Lezzer discusses office cleaners:  They all look the same to me.

Hol’s first day back at school: How small are year 7s?  I almost trod on one.

Dolly: Steve once took a special needs group to see The Matrix.

Jay to Alex: Just cos you have smiley faces and turkey aeroplanes when you get home.

I often forget what I was planning to say: Hol are you going to eat these shoes or what?

Alex: We’re the last sane generation.

Dolly to Alex: I’ve got no knowledge of computers and you’ve got no common sense.

Lezzer: My friend did Greg a few years ago at Bankfield.

Lezzer: You need some of that – what do you call it – slippy slappy?

Karen: Isn’t it funny how you look at funerals now?  I’m starting to grade them…judging the quality of the coffin, the food…

Jay: Monks are always attracted to me.

Alex: Is that the one whose face got ate off by a monkey?

Alex: The Irish age faster.

Jay: Is that someone’s real name – Ed Balls?  What a knob.

The Seven Dwarves TV show discussion

Lezzer: I’d love to see them in a pantomime.
And: Nice stereotyping there, Lez.
Alex: It’s the only job you can get if you’re a dwarf.

Facebook statuses

Danielle: That awkward moment when you go out for a family meal and you wake up with your pyjamas on back to front, sick in the toilet and your fella’s coat on instead of a quilt….ugh

Marie: I really think the lads waiting for TOWIE to start are a stone’s throw from bent.

On-line dating profile

Nell and I are working on completing her on-line profile for catch.com:
Me:  Right, you’ve got to say what you want in a partner.  So what would you say would be his best feature?
Nell:  Put “Can hang wallpaper”.
Me:  Erm, that’s not on the list…

I heard some wonderful dating stories while I was researching my dating blog post, but this was my favourite

Girl and guy on first date.  The guy keeps rubbing the girl’s back and then he says to her:  You’re really lovely, aren’t you?  And you haven’t got back sausages.

Off the telly

Sheldon Cooper:  Smart?  I’d have to lose 60 IQ points to be classified as smart.


There are some other Quotes of the Year, just click on a link below

Quotes of the Year Part 1

Quotes of the Year Part Deux

Quotes of the Year Part 3

Some more information about QOTY

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